My understanding on LIFE..

The people who are reading this needs to go through an epilogue about me and my views, I can be described as someone who has never reached the maximum height in any faces of this materialistic world, be it education, money, fame, or possession. And hence whatever I jolt down in this space might be slightly or at times completely contrary to what your beliefs and experience thought you. It can also happen that there is a disagreement in views as you may be on top in one of these above mentioned area like education, money, fame or possession. And I can’t discard the possibility of your mind mocking me for I am the unprivileged narrator of this whole thing.

I am sharing my thoughts about a four letter word called LIFE, and it’s ironic that it was easier to understand what my name meant, which is three times bigger when we quantify with the discrete called alphabet, than what life is.

What life meant to me..? I would like to start with my childhood, where it meant abundance, and it meant peaceful existence. The one general reasoning for this could be that I longed for many small things in my childhood which my parents struggled to make me experience. Predominantly materialistic desire and I wanted those materialistic existences along with peaceful atmosphere. Years passed and when I passed out of the first level of a job fetch able education, I started working out to fulfil this materialistic desire. I squandered, schemed and toiled my days to make money so that I can get the things which constitutes LIFE.

I Added gadgets, bike, drinks, food, movies books, and many other things which my mind once desired or which my mind desired at that point of time, but unfortunately I did not find it as fulfilling, I felt that these materialistic things do not have life, and they are not giving me something which I desire to get, and if I am to think what I desired I had no answers. I then came up to a conclusion that I desire something living, which is materialistic and which can respond to what my mind or emotions says. And I found the closest of a thing which matches my need explained in another four letter word called GIRL. By this time I was far ahead in my career, I stopped education, but I still believe I learned more that education would have thought, and I started searching the so called LIFE giving GIRL. Since I was not keen on any materialistic things I left all I possessed where I was and started the search.

I searched, with lots of energy and plight to find something which I believed would make me feel happy, peaceful and enriched. And after drilling out 86 people I found out someone who I felt can replace my requirement. The problem started here, the so called angel never accepts anyone so easily, and we need to make deals to her mind and for that whatever I felt is not needed just before should be bought back to my atmosphere. And this was the first time I realised that it’s not what I am mentally which makes me, but it’s the surrounding which I possess which make the real Me

I started from where I left off, from a splendour to unicorn, from Nokia 1100 to SE 810i, from hamam to cintol, from Tamarind to Louis Philippe and from single to committed. There was joy, excitement, pleasure, and over and above there was sense of love and care. I felt I unearthed something which many have not noticed; I felt the LIFE is simply another four letter word for LOVE. I was mystic, and I felt I reached the summit, and I was confident that I understood what most of the others did not understand, I felt the meaning of life as simple, for me at that point of time life was something to be LIVED with your LOVED one. It has nothing to do with any material. But then suddenly as it happens in the monsoon, the thunderbolt struck, the latest addition to my poignant mind made me understand that I am far behind what others are in terms of education, money and fame, and it was dismal to learn that they are essential part to understand what LIFE is, and I by this time had lost most of them, in such a distance that I cant reach back and take them, now the four letter need called GIRL disappeared from my life, and I reached back to my initial state with a difference of loosing those materialistic things, and as I was believing I had found out what life meant, I was never prepared for a surprise, and I thought this is what called life is, and I thought I learned it the hardest way. There was no hope in living, and I had run out of time, it was depressing and sad, but then I was told that the choice is always mine and I can continue or quit. I decided to continue my quest, I went to meditation camps, I found people around pills and physiatrists, I found few others looking for new love and life as if nothing has ever happened to them in past and after an year, I found someone who listened to my experience, the person whom I dumped when I begin my quest to learn, and I have now a meaning to the whole thing, the thing called LIFE, I believe its love. Material gets worn out, we never remember the colour of our favourite toy which we played at age 5, we don’t remember how much money was given to me for vishu when I was 10 years, we don’t remember how much was I thinking to earn when I was in my first job.

But I do remember how my mom treated us, there was love, how my brother and sister treats, that’s love, how I felt when with my best buddy, there was love. The thing which I feel will never change is our desire to be loved and to love, materialistic need change and will never makes us happy, My mother loved me even before I went to school, and she still loves me even after I preach statistics. What I mean here is she never looked for my qualification or earnings; all she looked was for happiness. For all people who things LIFE can be explained by a combination of money, fame, qualification and of course a bit of love, then I would like you to think well. Living with someone whom loves us despite Money, Material, fame and qualification is eternal. Stick to the ones you love, it’s not because they will not leave you, but it’s because your love will never leave YOU.

I too was in love, and am in love with this life. And I will live it such a way that my life loves me.

Occasionally in life there are those moments of unutterable fulfillment which cannot be completely explained by those symbols called words. Their meanings can only be articulated by the inaudible language of the heart.
- Martin Luther King, Jr